Relationships are an investment in time, money, and your heart. But sometimes, your partner may feel unloved and constantly complain that you aren't there for them. That could be a hint that their love language is quality time. Let's explore how to tap into quality time as a love language and get your relationship ever blazing.
7 mins read
Has your partner been complaining that they no longer feel loved? Do your arguments now constantly include statements like, "You don't understand me"? Yet, deep inside, you know you love them but can't figure out how to show them that they mean the world to you.
The solution may lie in tapping into their love language.
A love language is how an individual prefers to receive love from their partner. By understanding your partner's love language, you can tailor your actions in a way that meets their needs and desires. In Chapman’s five languages of love, your partner will have one dominant love language. And this is the critical component you need to grasp and learn how to express to them for your relationship to flourish.
In this article, we’ll explore quality time as a love language, how to tell if it's your partner’s love language, and the best and most practical tips to invoke it into your relationship.
People who speak quality time as their love language feel loved when their partners make a conscious effort to spend time with them. Quality is the emphasis here. It means no distractions, having meaningful conversations, and “being in the moment” kind of love.
Tapping into quality time as a love language is one of the ways to build a happy and healthy relationship.
Its benefits include:
It gets much simpler because you know what to do. Expressing your love in the only way they understand and lets your partner know they matter to you.
While quality time may be your partner's love language, the feeling of being loved and valued is mutual. Your partner feels loved and valued when you spend intentionally meaningful time together, and you feel the same way when it's reciprocated.
Not only does spending quality time meet your partner’s needs, but it also naturally incorporates other love languages like physical touch and acts of service, creating deeper emotional intimacy.
Consistent communication is a big part of the quality time love language. Expressing love as your partner needs it builds and strengthens communication in your relationship.
Did you know that languages of love apply to more than romantic relationships? They can also be used to show appreciation to our family and children, friends and acquaintances, and work colleagues.
Now that you better understand the quality time love language and its benefits, you would naturally want to express it more to your partner. So, the next big question would be, “What signs do you look out for that confirm quality time as your partner’s love language?
Don't fret. Paying attention to these signs can give you all the answers you need.
The Words They Say
A love language inevitably makes us express love in the way we want to receive it. To get the best clues, listen to the words they say after you spend time together. You’ll find expressions like:
What you notice from these expressions is the anticipation they have to spend more time with you in the future. Well, in the first few months of dating, we all look forward to the meetups, but this need never wanes away for your partner, even a year later.
The Common Complaints
Listen keenly to what your partner complains about. Do they include concerns like these?
As stated above, you'll realize that they crave undivided attention and your genuine interest in what they have to say, which, if provided, would make them feel special and loved.
The Words They Say
For long-term relationships, the words they say that signal how much they appreciate your time together may include:
The Complaints They Make
When you’re around the house, look out for what your partner feels is missing in your relationship. Some of the top statements may include:
If these statements resurface frequently, you may be showing love to your partner in a language they don't understand. So, what can you do to make them feel loved and valued?
Do you want to improve at speaking the love language of quality time? You can master a new love language with a little extra effort and a whole lot of listening.
To give you a head start, we've curated practical things you can do early in dating, long-term relationships, long-distance relationships, and grand gestures for special occasions. Please note that some of these tips may overlap and apply to all the phases of your relationship.
Need ideas for the perfect gift for someone with the Quality Time language of love? Read this!
We feel your pain if you're looking at the lists above and gasping in despair. It may not be your cup of tea, but with a bit of dedication, learning to speak your partner's love language is worth the effort. Think of it as a win-win when your partner is happy and can't get enough of you.
It’s also worth mentioning that knowing love languages is only one of the things that can impact your relationship.
Your personality, for instance, influences your communication style and how you handle conflict, all of which have relationship implications.
As such, you’re always learning new things about your partner and yourself. And this is true whether you’ve just started dating, two years into marriage, or two decades along. What’s important is that you now know the precise love language to express to your partner to ignite an everlasting spark in your relationship.
If you are still not sure whether your partner speaks the language of Quality Time, these articles may help you figure out their true language of love: Physical Touch, Receiving Gifts, Words of Affirmation, and Acts of Service.
Content Writer
Published 11 November 2023