Extroverts are often seen as people who thrive in social settings and need the external stimulation of a crowd to feel alive. But that doesn’t mean every extrovert hates being alone.
Many extroverts find tremendous joy and fulfillment in solitude. This is because extroversion is a spectrum with introversion at the opposite end. Like with any continuum, there can be variability between the two ends. However, it's possible to be an extrovert who leans towards the introverted side (or vice versa).
This combination of traits is often called "introverted extroverts" or "ambiverts."
This type of person is usually found in the middle of the spectrum, able to find happiness and fulfillment in both solitude and social settings.
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5 Signs You’re an Introverted Extrovert — Happy in Crowds and Alone!
Introversion and extroversion are traits measured by personality tests like the Big 5 and the Myers-Briggs. Taking such an assessment is a definitive way to see how you score on the spectrum. While we often see these traits as being “either or,” the truth is that it’s actually quite rare for someone to score 100% extrovert or 100% introvert.
Whichever side we lean more towards, most of us have at least a little bit of the other. And then there is that group that falls pretty close to the midline — the ambiverts, who make up about two-thirds of the population.
Someone who is an ambivert displays a healthy balance of introversion and extroversion, in contrast to an omnivert who experiences these traits in extremes.
Interesting fact: Research shows Ambiverts tend to perform better on IQ tests.
Wondering if you fall into this category? Here are 5 signs that may indicate you're an extrovert who's perfectly happy being alone.
1. You are comfortable with your own company.
Typically, extroverts are considered life-of-the-party types who constantly need the stimulation of friends and new experiences. But that is not always true.
While extroverts need more external stimulation than introverts, some can be perfectly content just spending time alone. Much like everybody else, you need time to relax and recharge. This means that socializing machines also like to take part in some solo activities as much as they enjoy being around others.
2. You're selectively social.
Unlike a true extrovert who finds relationships and interactions with others energizing, you're picky about whom you choose to spend your time with. Plus, you don't feel the need to maintain a large social network full of acquaintances and surface-level relationships.
You also don't click with everyone you meet. You're not afraid to turn down social invitations if you don't feel like going out or it's not the right fit for you. So, you’re content with your few close friendships and relationships.
3. You always have an exit plan.
If you're like most people, at least once you've found yourself in a situation where you felt you couldn't get away fast enough. Maybe it was a date that felt like torture or an event where you couldn't find someone to talk to. As an ambivert, your extroverted side will want to stick around and fight through the awkwardness. In contrast, your introverted side will want to hightail it out of there. So, to satisfy both parts of yourself, you'll usually devise an exit plan to give you a way out without looking rude.
Your escape plan could involve something as simple as setting the alarm on your phone so you can make an excuse to leave early or perhaps giving your friend strict instructions to call you in half an hour so they can "rescue" you. Either way, you know you always have a plan B if all else fails.
4. Your social battery gets affected by your environment.
Being an extrovert who's happy being alone means your energy levels aren't consistent. You might feel energized and refreshed after a night out, or it may leave you drained. The amount of energy you have is highly dependent on your environment, particularly who surrounds you. You may feel more energized if the people around you give off positive vibes.
On the other hand, if the environment and people around you are negative or dull, your social battery will take a hit.
5. You don't live by people's expectations.
When we're around people, it's easy to get swayed by their opinions. We might be tempted to change our behavior or do things simply because we want to fit in. Extroverts are expected to entertain, ice break in parties, or help people liven up the atmosphere.
While these expectations can be fun for extroverts, introverted extroverts don't need to live up to these standards set by society. This doesn't mean you can't entertain or have a good time — it just means you don't feel the need to do so against your own will. You do things of your own volition. You might listen to other people's expectations, but you don't feel the need to abide by them. Instead, you live by your expectations and make choices that satisfy your needs and wants.
Ambiverts: Neither “Extrovert” Nor “Introvert”
You're probably an ambivert if you've always been in a pickle to choose between these two labels.
Ambiverts have introverted qualities like listening and enjoying time alone and are fascinated by human beings' internal worlds. Far from that, ambiverts are energized by time spent with others, have awesome social skills, and ooze out self-confidence like an extrovert.
But this shouldn't be misconstrued as "anything goes."
Obviously, they're flexible, but they have needs — meaning that if either side of the spectrum is neglected, they'll often feel exhausted. Again, balance is key.
As an ambivert, you must have a self-awareness that enables you to tune in to your feelings and understand what nourishes you, irrespective of where you are.
Want to find out where you score on the introversion/extroversion continuum? Take the Big 5 Assessment!
