Does this sound like you or someone you know? Whenever you see someone in need, you're not content with only encouraging them. You want to go the extra mile by providing impactful assistance because the hands-on approach shows you care.
You are a great team player at your workplace but also possess excellent leadership skills to lead when required. You’re friendly with your co-workers and thrive in a supportive, organized environment.
Your love for helping others is genuine, not merely a quid pro quo. Still, you sometimes depend on or actively seek people's approval to feel good about yourself. Being praised by others makes you feel elated, while criticism derails your mood.
All these qualities belong to the Myers-Briggs ESFJ personality type.
People with this personality are called many names. Some call them the Consul. They are also known as “the providers.” We call them caregivers because they go out of their way to spread happiness and care for others.
This article is a comprehensive guide on the ESFJ personality. We discuss their qualities, strengths and weaknesses, likes and dislikes, communication styles, career choices, relationships, and some famous examples.
Do you know your Myers-Briggs personality type? Reading this article is much more fun if you’re trying to learn more about yourself or a friend. Please spare a moment to take our version of the MBTI assessment. Then hang on to your seat and enjoy the rest of the article.
What Is the ESFJ Personality?
Isabel Myers and her mother, Myers Briggs, were passionate about helping others. They made it their life’s work to develop a comprehensive self-report personality inventory called the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI for short) to help people understand who they were and the reason for their behavior. They hoped this report would help people realize their potential in relationships, workplaces, careers, and life.
Your knowledge of the ESFJ personality hinges on your understanding of the MBTI. If you’re hearing about this model for the first time or need to know more about it, we suggest reading our comprehensive MBTI article.
The ESFJ is one of the 16 personalities recognized by the MBTI, and it stands for Extraversion, Sensing, Feeling, and Judging. As extroverts, caregivers like to be around people and interact with them in public places. They are very concerned about building their social status, which they can’t do if they spend all their time alone in their rooms. Their sensing personality makes them focus more on facts than imagined concepts.
As feelers, they make decisions based on their feelings instead of logic. In decision-making, their heart takes precedence over their head. The caregiver’s judging nature makes them seek order, structure, and organization over chaos and unpredictability.
It’s important to note that while an ESFJ person may be the actual caregiver for another person, the label refers more to their caregiving nature rather than the responsibility.
How Common Is the ESFJ Personality?
The ESFJ is the second most common personality in the United States. According to a poll, the ESFJ personality accounted for 12.3 percent of the United States population, seventeen percent of the female population, and eight percent of the male population.
What Is The Communication Style of ESFJ Personality?
Caregivers communicate freely with others. At social events, they interact well with others and try to ensure everyone is having a wonderful time. Despite their love for attention, they are genuinely interested in listening to others. However, they can be critical of those whose ideas contradict their values and beliefs.
ESFJ Personalities You May Recognize
As one of the most common MBTI personality types, it’s no surprise that many famous people exhibit ESFJ traits. Here are some ESFJ caregivers you may recognize.
- Actors and Actresses like Chris Evans, Jennifer Garner, and Jennifer Aniston.
- Leaders like Joe Biden and Sam Walton (Founder of Walmart).
- Musicians like Taylor Swift, Whitney Houston, Jennifer Lopez, and Ariana Grande.
- TV Personalities like Barbara Walters, Jimmy Fallon, and Tyra Banks.
- Athletes like Lebron James and Simone Biles.
How Do You Know If You Are an ESFJ?
An ESFJ personality test will tell you for sure whether this is your personality type. However, some clues can help to identify someone with ESFJ traits.
Do you love doing everything in your power to help others? Does going out and socializing with people energize you? Do you love order and structure and dislike chaos? Are you a rule follower? You might be a caregiver if you answered yes to all these questions.
There are many signs to look out for to determine if you’re an ENJF caregiver, but the following are the most common.
ESFJs Rise by Lifting Others
The primary goal of the caregiver is to care for others and spread happiness to them. ESFJs love going above and beyond to help people in need, even if they don’t ask for it. They earned the nickname “caregivers” or “providers” because they are kind-hearted people who are happy when they’ve made others happy.
ESFJs Gossip Without Malice
Although caregivers want to know and share details about the life of those around them, they bear no malice towards those they gossip about. They do it for fun and to increase their social status. It puts them in a great position to help when needed.
ESFJs Are Social Butterflies
Caregivers are outgoing. They are the life of the party. You notice them trying to interact with ‘everyone’ at social events, ensuring no one is left out. Despite loving the spotlight, they take the time to listen to others and make them feel good about themselves.
Although they love making new acquaintances to improve their social status, they use their fame as a means to an end. Being famous allows them to reach more people and help others more significantly.
ESFJs Are Loyal and Dependable
There’s an expression, “When he gives you his word, you can take it to the bank.” Can anyone say this about you? Caregivers are loyal and dependable. Their word is their bond. Caregivers remain devoted to a loved one through thick and thin. They are always eager and ready to stand up and defend their loved ones when wronged, even when they might not do the same for themselves.
ESFJs Seek Outside Validation
Caregivers are okay with going out of their way to help others but don't want to feel like people are taking them for granted. When they help others, they don't do it to gain special favors. However, caregivers want people to appreciate them for what they've done. They do not react well to criticism; their mood often depends on how well people enjoy their acts of kindness.
ESFJs Are Sticklers for Rules
Caregivers believe in the rule of law and try to abide by it. They think rules help to bring order and balance to society. Because of their love for following the rules, they do not understand why anyone would want to break them.
ESFJs Are Great Team Players and Leaders
You would love having a caregiver as a teammate because they are warm, supportive, and kind-hearted. They understand that there is no “I” in “team,” so they form a strong bond with their teammates and bring out the best in them. Caregivers have formidable leadership skills. They involve their followers by respecting their opinions, putting their needs first, and making them feel valued.
ESFJs Are Conscientious Helpers
What is worth doing at all is worth doing well. Caregivers are conscientious workers. They do their best to guarantee excellence when they decide to do something.
ESFJs Have a Natural Understanding of Others
Caregivers tend to notice small details about other people’s feelings, signs that the average person might miss. Because they can notice little signs of distress or discomfort in others, people are more comfortable around them, which helps them take better care of others.
ESFJs Favor Reality over Imagination
Caregivers love to make decisions based on what is real. They embrace reality and are rarely carried away by imagination. They find it hard to understand those who make life decisions based on hunches and imagined concepts.
ESFJs Love Comfort Zones
Familiarity might breed contempt for many people, but caregivers love their comfort zones. Even when they take vacations, they choose places with a semblance of familiarity instead of opening themselves up to new experiences. Constantly trying out new things causes them stress, and they are happier in their comfort zone.
ESFJs Love Being in Control
Caregivers take control of their lives by planning events, organizing tasks on to-do lists, having schedules, and setting short and long-term goals. They love structure and organization because it allows them to stay in control.
ESFJs Empathize with People
Caregivers take on people’s problems as if they were theirs by imagining what it is like to be in their shoes. They take empathy to a new level by becoming so focused on the plight of those they are supposed to help that they sometimes forget about their problems. This tendency can make them prime candidates for developing empathy fatigue.
ESFJs Prioritize Spending Time with Friends and Family
Home is where the heart is. For caregivers, nothing beats spending quality time with their friends and family. Their happiness is usually influenced by how much people appreciate or love them. And what better place to find love than with friends and family?
Strengths of the ESFJ Personality Type
The greatest strength of the ESJF person is helping others. Caregivers do not turn their backs on those who need help. They are intent on spreading happiness to those around them, and they derive so much joy in this that they actively seek a career where they can do much good in the world.
As a caregiver, you must understand what people need and what makes them tick. Caregivers excel in this regard because of their innate understanding of others and ability to notice little details. They can sense when someone around them is uncomfortable, sad, lonely, etc., and they immediately try to care for that person.
They are great team players but also have remarkable leadership skills. They bring out the best in others, whether as teammates or leaders. They are bold, confident, and have a great deal of empathy. Caregivers find it easy to approach people, interact with them, listen to their problems, and help solve them. They are usually popular because they make several friends and acquaintances due to their kind and outgoing attribute.
Caregivers are conscientious helpers. You can expect them to give their all in everything they do. And if they fail, you can be sure it is not because of the lack of trying. They are loyal and devoted. Once they give you their word, they are ready to stand by you and defend you come what may.
Weaknesses of ESFJ Personality Type
Great things can be harmful when you overdo them. This can be the case with caregivers when they go out of their way to help others. Sometimes, their extremely giving nature comes at a personal expense as they neglect their individual needs while helping others solve problems.
Other times, they insist on helping people who don’t need or want their help. Their passion for helping others can overwhelm them, causing them to misunderstand when they have crossed boundaries.
Caregivers do not take to criticism kindly. They are so sensitive that even constructive criticism can hurt them deeply. They want to feel appreciated for their efforts, and their mood can sometimes be influenced by how much praise or criticism they get. Caregivers are also very needy. They seek people’s validation in everything they do.
Although caregivers are generally kind, they can be intolerant of other people’s ways. They have been known to criticize other beliefs or values different from theirs because they see the world in black and white, rarely opening up their minds to change or new experiences. Their love for the status quo makes them unwilling to change their lifestyle by starting a new job or moving to a new house.
Caregivers love to be in control. While this is usually a good quality, their need for control sometimes transforms into a need to control people. They love following the rules. Unfortunately, they sometimes follow the rules blindly without ever questioning them.
What Are Hobbies and Dislikes of ESFJs?
People with the ESFJ personality generally enjoy activities where they can showcase their abilities as caregivers. Their hobbies often include volunteering at charity functions, nursing homes, shelters, food banks, etc. They also love planning and organizing social events with friends and family, throwing parties, cooking, etc.
They dislike activities where people break the law, so you shouldn't invite them to spray paint walls, billboards, and buildings illegally. They also dislike sudden changes or new experiences where things have the potential to spiral out of control.
Relationship between ESFJ and the Big Five Personality Traits
The MBTI personality type theory examines personality as a binary function. You're either extraverted or introverted, a feeling type or a thinking type. But traits are more complex than that. While millions of people can have the same personality type, it’s hard to find people with the same score or "degree" of any group of personality traits.
The five-factor model examines personality traits as a spectrum where a person can score between 0 to 100% on each attribute. Let's look at the performance of the ESFJ personality on the Big Five personality trait spectrum.
Openness to Experience
Openness describes the extent to which an individual is willing to embrace change and new experiences. Caregivers are averse to change. They love routines and comfort zones and plan their activities to avoid surprises.
Conscientiousness
Caregivers score high in conscientiousness because they try their best to accomplish their goals through dedication, effective planning, and scheduling. You’ll hardly find an unchecked item on a caregiver’s to-do list.
Extraversion
Unsurprisingly, caregivers score high in this trait. Caregivers love going out, planning and attending social events, and interacting with people.
Agreeableness
Agreeable characters are warm, loving, and kind. They can put the needs of others above their own, just like caregivers. They both dislike conflict.
Neuroticism
This trait describes the frequency and degree to which a person experiences negative emotions. While caregivers can exhibit mood swings when criticized or ignored, there is no positive correlation between the ESFJ personality and Neuroticism.
Want to see how your personality traits stack up in the five-factor model? The BrainManager Big 5 self-assessment will give you the answers!
Best Careers for the ESFJ Personality
People with ESFJ personality traits enjoy working in a friendly and supportive environment free of conflict. They are dependable. When given tasks, they work hard to complete those tasks. They rarely have problems at work because they love following the rules and doing their best to avoid conflict.
They usually develop a strong bond with their co-workers, especially if their colleagues are conscientious and action-oriented. Caregivers relate well with their subordinates, making them feel valued and bringing out their best.
Caregivers actively pursue careers where they can genuinely help people. They usually opt for careers in social work, education, or healthcare. Caregivers often work as nurses, teachers, social workers, childcare providers, counselors, physicians, religious workers, Human Resources Managers, etc.
The organizing and management skills of the ESFJ make them suitable as office managers, bookkeepers, school administrators, etc. Because of their love for upholding the law, they can make good police officers or other law enforcement agents.
The ESFJ Personality Relationship Style
If caregivers can go out of their way to help others, imagine how far they will be willing to go for their close friends or romantic partners. Caregivers always seek meaningful long-term relationships where they can adequately care for and support their partners. However, they don’t want a one-sided relationship where they are the only ones trying to make it work.
If your partner is an ESFJ, tell them how much you love and value them, and appreciate everything they do to make you happy. Caregivers detest conflict, so they generally seek friends and partners who are understanding, tolerant, and least likely to start or encourage an argument.
Tips for Interacting with the ESFJ Personality Type
Building a conversation with caregivers requires little effort because they love interacting with people. However, you must take care to avoid offending them. Caregivers need to feel loved and valued. If you have an ESFJ friend or family member, try to appreciate their efforts and praise them for a job well done.
Their love for being in control and helping others may lead to them controlling others or offering help where it is not needed. They sometimes cross boundaries. When this happens, be careful not to be overly critical of their behavior. Help them understand where they went wrong and appreciate the effort.
When interacting with caregivers, know your indifference is just as brutal as your criticism. It's not enough for you not to criticize them; make sure you're not indifferent to their time, energy, and effort while caring for you. Please don't make them ask for your approval or appreciation before you give them because they can become very needy.
Don't force them to embrace new experiences or sudden changes. And whatever you do, do not plan surprise parties for them. They won't enjoy them the way you want them to.
If all of this information sounds a lot like you, the only way to know is to take an ESFJ personality type test. You'll learn whether you really do have an ESFJ personality — or one that’s similar.